The Friday Feels

Ok…so the translation still remains untranslated…
Its not my fault that it’s so tediously boring. When you’ve been given a passage with hardly any full stops or conjunctions, it literally feels like you are drowning in a sea of long words and never ending lists.

I really regret getting into Radiohead’s recent album. When you listen to a song over and over again, there comes a time when it dominates your brain and you memorise every single note of each instrument and how they intertwine together within the piece. How can I possibly concentrate on the expanding of the Russian empire when at the same time I’ve got a string quartet performing a masterpiece in my head?
The funny thing is I’ve never really been a big fan of Radiohead. I guess my tastes are changing.

So, the weekend’s here. As usual I have no concrete plans.
Normally I walk over to my other friends flat with the impression that we’re going to do something at least mildly social – like go out, or watch a film or chat. But when I arrive, its always the same: no one’s had dinner, everyone’s too tired to move, someone disappears to call her boyfriend for 50 minutes. And we end up sitting on the sofa in silence, all looking at our phones and tagging each other in shrek memes or watching disgusting weird shit like “hair cake”.
Then at midnight I’ll return to my messy room, throw some junk in the oven, religiously listen to whatever song is plaguing my concentration that day and watch an episode of Seinfeld – even though I don’t even like the show. (I’ve got through 8 seasons within a month though, I can’t stop now.)

What is happening to my life.

You know, I don’t really know what all the hype is about University.
Unless you’re a massive extrovert who lives to party and socialise, everyday seems a little monotonous and…disappointing.
I’m basically paying £9000 to live somewhere other than home, to forget all about nutritional meals and to study a pretty average course in which I spend hours working alone only to find out that I am still failing the year.
I miss the days when I could freely make music or play sims or create animations without feeling guilty about taking time off. There’s always stuff to read and things to improve on.
My gap year was a really tough year for me. So as much as it is a relief to escape my tyrannical parents and start afresh in a new place, its still not a massive step up in terms of feeling better, or feeling like I’m making the most of my existence on planet earth.

I think one’s experience at Uni is also influenced by what kind of people you are first surrounded by. I think if I were living in a different flat, with people more like myself, I would have had a better start to the year with a more positive and confident outlook on things. That’s why I mainly spend all day on campus – there’s nothing really to look forward to when I go back to my halls of residence.

It is what it is, though.

Its funny to think that most of my friends would not be my friends now if I had made minute changes to the day that I met them. For example, had I arrived a minute earlier or later than I did to my first lecture, I would have never stood next to Willow and made the awkward conversation that led to our friendship now.

Sorry if this is really boring. I was actually going to talk about something specific today, but I think I’ll just leave that to my next post.


Ok, I really should go. Maybe I’ll bump into my crazy half-friend. That never fails to entertain.




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